The Mary Sue: Chapter 12

Chapter 12: How to not be a "Mary Sue"


In the previous 11 chapters of The Guide to The Mary Sue we have discussed the different traits of the characters classified as "Mary Sue", and their effect on literature as a whole. The "Mary Sue" is a disease that has been spreading throughout the world of literature since the inclusion of appealing male characters in stories. While some Mary Sues have become socially accepted, in some cases, even worshiped, i.e. Bella Swan in Twilight , there are some that have become the bane of the fanfiction community.

In this chapter, our personal researcher into the world of the "Mary Sue", has some things she would like to say about how to avoid being THAT fanfic writer.


We've all been there. Looking through the pages of a book, slowly falling for [insert name of attractive male character here], and we have all wanted to escape this reality and live in the world that books and other pieces of literature have created. As someone who once suffered from Marititis Suetosis (the medical term for this condition), I understand where you are coming from, but there are a few key boundaries that need to be upheld for the fanfiction to hold any real merit. I have compiled a list of a few things that need to be noted when designing an original character and writing his or her story.

A. Designing Your Character

1. Body Type-

We're girls, we all hate SOMETHING about the way we look, and writing and drawing our own characters is a way to envision a more "beautiful" version of ourselves. Of course we don't want our visions of ourselves to be "ugly". If you prefer straight hair over your curls, go ahead! Hate your dorky glasses? Your character has PERFECT eyesight! Have too many love handles? A normal weight is perfect for an action heroine! However, there are a few features of the body that tend to get over-dramatized, namely, the breasts, waist, and butt.

The "Boobs"
Please, for the love of all that is female, do not go overly insane with boob sizes. You are trying to write a romantic story or a slice-of-life tale about you. You are NOT writing a porno or drawing hentai. Remember, slutty characters are looked down upon, and even though we want to be pretty and sexy, we don't want to be a sex icon.
Also, please consider the age of your character. For example, the main characters in Naruto are around the ages of 12-16. Your 12-year old ninja girl does NOT need double D's, and if she does have double D's, we can thus label her "jailbait". Congratulations, you are the sexual fantasy of single, big, hairy, 50-year old men. I hope you're proud.

The Waist
None of us want a "fat" character, but there is a limit to how thin you should go. If the waist is almost as thin as the neck, that's a bad sign. Not only is this COMPLETELY unrealistic, it is also COMPLETELY disgusting. A real girl is not shaped like a stick with boobs, if we were, our celebrities would look chunkier.
That's another fact. The vision of beauty in a lot of fashion magazines is all about the "thin as Skeletor" look. I have talked to REAL men and most don't like girls like that, saying they look "unhealthy" or the guys are afraid "I'll break them". Keep the waist well proportioned to the rest of the body. Bigger breasts normally involve a bigger waist. Do not go out of control with the thin ideal. We aren't helping the media and culture if we continue to picture "beauty" as deathly thin, and we are thus only contributing to the issue.

The Butt
Not much to say about this one, as it normally doesn't get over-done as much as the other two, but unless you're going for a super-stylistic approach (that would be COMPLETELY unrealistic) we do not want a pencil-waist, basketball boobs, and a "bah-donk-a-donk" butt. If your character's butt is as wide as the elbows, you have a problem, especially if she has a thin, thin waist. "Bah-donk-a-donk" butts rarely happen on pencil-thin girls. Remember that. It is a butt, not a second pair of breasts, nor is it a Siamese twin attached to your rear. Treat it with respect, it deals with enough of your shit as it is.

2. Facial Details-

Hair
I get it, you're in a sad mood, and your character has blue hair, but then when you draw her later, she has pink hair because she's with a cute guy. OK, your hair is NOT a mood ring. If your hair changes color like that, it makes it difficult to tell who your character is, especially if drawn in a group picture or re-introduced into the comic suddenly. You don't want to confuse your viewers/readers. You want your character to be easily recognizable.
Yes, you can have your character have wacky color hair as long as it goes with who she is. OK for anime, but do not make a Doctor Who character with pink hair unless she dyed her hair. Pink hair is not natural. Any girl who says her pink hair is natural, is a liar, unless, again, the girl is an anime character. If it's for anime, it's a-OK.

Eyes
Like the hair, don't change the eye color every minute. If the character has split personality/crazy powers/demon/Sharingaherpaderp then it's fine to have them change their eye color, but like your hair, your eyes are not mood rings. Also, if your character is one to change her hair color on a normal basis (or wear a wig, a la Jellyfish Princess ) then the eyes need to stay the same, as they are one of the defining characteristics of your character.
How else would the reader know that was [insert name of character here] and not [insert name of other character here]?

Ears and Tails
This is a touchy subject with some people, but ears and tails have been long abused by fangirls to make characters that are Mary Sues. Your Mary Sue will not be any less Mary Sue-like if she has ears and a tail!
If your character is a demon of some sort, make sure that you research the demon type and try to follow those guidelines. People try to mess with the basic formula of what makes up a demon type, i.e. sparkling vampires, and if you do, please do try and give an explanation then about why it's different than the main belief. As much as I hate to say it, Stephanie Myer did do a nice job of explaining why the vampires sparkled, and how that was confused with "human beliefs about vampirism".
Here's a basic tip list:
Kitsune (fox demons): Normally have multiple tails. Tails normally signify age, more tails, older or more powerful character. Do not give your character 9 fox tails unless you do it in a way that does not relate to Naruto . One way to avoid mix-up is to avoid the whisker marks Naruto has. Those are HIS. They are not true to all kitsune-type characters.

Vampires: SUCK BLOOD. Sharp fangs, normally seen as pale. You normally won't have a tan vampire. That'd look really strange.

Werewolves: Transform on the full moon. Do not confuse with Jacob. He was not a werewolf, as revealed in the last Twilight book, but was actually a shape-shifter taking the form of a wolf.

Succubus: Steal energy from men through some sort of sexual or romantic act, i.e. kissing, erotic dreams, or having sex. They are like vampires in a sense.

Sirens: Use singing to drive men insane, lure men, or steal energy. Often associated with mermaids.

Mermaids: See Sirens

Neko (cat demon): Smaller fangs than a vampire. Cat tail and ears. Normally marks like "///" on the cheeks to signify a whisker-like look.

Inu (Dog demon): Similar size fangs to the neko, only a bit sharper. Dog/wolf ears and tail are optional. A typical facepaint for inu would be red triangles on the cheeks, i.e. Princess Mononoke, Kiba.

Shinigami (Death Gods): Appearance changes according to the author. Known for taking souls.

Fae (fairies, pixies, etc): Depending on the race of fae, features change. Fairies are small and compact, like pixies. Where elves and nymphs are taller. All fae have long features, long legs, long fingers, long arms, long necks, long faces... They are graceful.

Excalibur: FOOL! My legend begins in the--- No. Don't do it. EVER. AVOID AT ALL COSTS. S-O-S. MAY DAY. DELETE DELETE. RUN FOR THE HILLS. Just.... NO.


3. Clothing-

Go wild on clothing. Skin-tight is fine. Transparent is fine. Do whatever you want, it's your character! Just remember the slut rule, if a character's skirt is shorter than her wrists (and there are no shorts, pants, or leggings underneath) then it's too short. If the shirt cuts down so much you can almost see a nipple, that's too much.

Remember, you're writing a story about YOU. Not about the local hooker. Unless you or your character is a hooker, then go wild. Have her wear nothing.


A tip on kimono: Kimono are better for formal occasions with characters. Most kimono, namely the fancy Geisha-like kind, have so many layers that it's difficult to move. Be reasonable. A ninja most likely won't wear a long kimono, because it would be hard to move in.
If you REALLY want your character in a kimono let her go to a summer festival or fireworks show. Traditional Japanese garb looks nice surrounded by a Japanese festival, and it's a great excuse to draw that gorgeous kimono!

4. The Writing-

Do not be overly descriptive about body parts. That turns your innocent little story about your exorcist joining the Black Order into an ero-fest featuring a girl in an exorcist uniform. There are several words to avoid using because they radiate "sex". "Supple" has to be the worst.

Metaphors:
A tip on metaphors. Do not overuse them. They are to add flair to the writing. There is a difference between refined jewelery and gaudy jewelery, and that's all about the amount of gems on it. Simple is sometimes better.
Also, make sure your metaphors are easy to understand, unless you're going for comedy. Then feel free to say "like the color of the awakening sun on the east side bank of the Charles river, as it shone in the glimmering water---". If it's for humor. Go wild.

5. The Value of a Completed Series

It is much easier to write believable fanfiction for an already completed series. Why? After the curtains close, you're free to do whatever you want. Also, you already know all of the plot twists and who lives, who dies. Congrats, you can now pick a character to marry without them dying on you.

This being said, a completed series also has introduced all of the characters and has revealed their growth. This will be important in a later segment about "Picking the Right Guy".


6. Dealing With Plot

If your favorite character died, there is no normal way to bring them back to life, unless it applies to the series. If the character is dead, you can also not have your character stop the death from happening. The original author intended the character to die for a reason, the original author's original ideas mean more to the internet than your own version of their ideas. Too bad, but remember, you're basing your story off their series, so you have no say what goes on in the plot of the actual series.

There is one exception to this rule. Spin-off stories feature something that was changed from the original plot line, but then continue to a different conclusion. The only problem with these stories, is that a lot are either badly written or not well known.

7. Editing

No matter what it is you are submitting to the grand olde internet, make sure you read it over before hitting that "OK" button. Grammatical or spelling errors can make you seem unintelligent, and some of these errors are... *GASP* not picked up by SpellCheck!
Remember, you are vulnerable on the internet. You don't want to seem like an unintelligent slob who somehow got his or her hands onto a keyboard and tried to write something. Would you want to read a story like.... this..?

"She wuz not liek normal girls, cuz she was different. She was not liek them, cuz she had a demon in herd. This demon wz diffrent then theres, becuz she was not liek them. She wuld never be liek them. 'I will notbak down.' she cried'I will keeep fightin to end! That is wut he wold hav wanted mee to do!' I only ahve him... no one else."

It was painful to write that... But I have read fanfics with this... this... LACK OF EFFORT online!!! Use spell-check with a dictionary if you need to, because sometimes the words spell-check gives you aren't what you originally had in mind.

8. Picking the Right Guy

I understand, feelings change. Suddenly, a character you thought was "OK" has a major character change, and suddenly... HOLY CRAP, I DO WANT! This is one reason why completed series are so wonderful to work from; the only factor that would change what character you found attractive would be you. Let me put out a road-map of the Naruto characters that I liked as an example...

Naruto --> Sasuke --> Naruto --> Kiba --> Naruto --> Gaara --> Naruto --> Deidara --> Shikamaru --> Naruto --> Sai --> Shikamaru --> Sasuke --> Sai --> Suigetsu --> Sai --> Sasuke --> Suigetsu

It probably fluctuated more than that, but, you get the basic idea. This is why you need to be careful with how far into your romantic story you choose to go. I have (a) friend(s) whose character(s) has (have) had sex with, had children with, and been married to over 4 separate characters. And the character(s) are only normally around the age of.... 28?

Ok... whoa... you do not want to be the octo-mom with 3 kids from your first crush, 2 from the second, 2 from Mr. 3, and 1 from your most recent husband.

The big marriage scene should be the last chapter of your fanfic (or one of them). If you like more than one guy in a series, just create another character. Don't go hopping around from guy to guy. You don't want to be a skank, you just want to be in love with the guy you love, and you want him to love you back.

9. The Key to A Good Romance Story

It's hard to really get good at the timing of a romance story, but I believe that many romance authors are popular because there is always that doubt that the couple will get together. There needs to be a tug-and-pull relationship between your character and your character's crush.
Avoid rushing into a relationship. In real relationships, trust building, and love, take time. It takes time to fall in love with someone, so don't rush it. The suspense is what keeps readers coming back for more.

The best examples that I've seen for relationship timing would have to be:

Full Moon O Sagashite
Chobits
Princess Jellyfish
Panty and Stocking with Garterbelt
The Gentleman's Alliance +
AIR TV
Sugar Sugar Rune
DNAngel
Elfen Lied
FLCL
Ouran High School Host Club









Remember. This is your story. You don't have to take my advice, just think about it. After all, it's advice, not a command. I've been there, I've seen the worst the internet has to show for Mary Sues, and I've returned. I have grown from my crippling fight against Marititis Suetosis. I rose up, and beat it. There is no vaccine, no medicine, only time. I suppose it IS true what they say: Time heals all Mary Sues. Or... something like that...